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c a n s i t u a t i o n s r e a l l y c h a n g e ? ?
Monday, July 31, 2006
|
we're all adults
but can things really get better..?
no matter wad i still find this a childish behaviour
but i am hoping for the best...
we are after all a class..
i dun hold grudges but it hurts all the same
so i hope ur words are true.if not then...
well...same old same old
but can things really get better..?
no matter wad i still find this a childish behaviour
but i am hoping for the best...
we are after all a class..
i dun hold grudges but it hurts all the same
so i hope ur words are true.if not then...
well...same old same old
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EMOTIONAL RIDE
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
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sigh..2dae just totally suxed ..
basically my tears were like non stop flowing tap water for like 20 mins
thankz loads to adibah nat n tutz fer being there for me..
haiz..its been rather rough on me,and i'm basically the kind who likes to keep alot of my problems to myself n basically stay in silence n suffer
and when one day someone pushes that button like 2dae..i totally lost it
like totally ..i mean what u xpect me to do or react..my teacher told me that i may get kicked out of sch next yr if i dun do well in my promos...
wad kindda freaking encouragement is that????
what?? what??? sum1 tell me pls...
to make it worse i sometimes feel that my father really regret having me for a daughter,like i am a total failure in his eyes..
did u guys noe that when my mom was pregnant with me my dad had boys names in his head n when i was born he din noe wad to do or to name me coz i turned out to be a girl?
am i such a blardy disappointment to him??
i love my dad so much but haiz...he sure does noe how to hurt me
what to do??what? cannot give up ...i noe...
but rite now my spirit is broken..completely...i just have too much shit to deal with..i mean i have study issues n people issues!...i freaking hate a few of my classmates or shld i juz say a clique of em...damn asses la ok.. cant even be bothered to describe them anymore...i dun even noe if some of the frenship with me is genuine..haiz...sux like crazy
basically my life stinks.. duno y shit keeps happening to me
basically my tears were like non stop flowing tap water for like 20 mins
thankz loads to adibah nat n tutz fer being there for me..
haiz..its been rather rough on me,and i'm basically the kind who likes to keep alot of my problems to myself n basically stay in silence n suffer
and when one day someone pushes that button like 2dae..i totally lost it
like totally ..i mean what u xpect me to do or react..my teacher told me that i may get kicked out of sch next yr if i dun do well in my promos...
wad kindda freaking encouragement is that????
what?? what??? sum1 tell me pls...
to make it worse i sometimes feel that my father really regret having me for a daughter,like i am a total failure in his eyes..
did u guys noe that when my mom was pregnant with me my dad had boys names in his head n when i was born he din noe wad to do or to name me coz i turned out to be a girl?
am i such a blardy disappointment to him??
i love my dad so much but haiz...he sure does noe how to hurt me
what to do??what? cannot give up ...i noe...
but rite now my spirit is broken..completely...i just have too much shit to deal with..i mean i have study issues n people issues!...i freaking hate a few of my classmates or shld i juz say a clique of em...damn asses la ok.. cant even be bothered to describe them anymore...i dun even noe if some of the frenship with me is genuine..haiz...sux like crazy
basically my life stinks.. duno y shit keeps happening to me
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Thursday, July 20, 2006
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went for my MRI scan 2dae.it was scary i was in a tunnel full of lights..stupid things running thru my head.all that for 500bux..
sigh..i am such a pain to my parents for wasting their money. of all things my hip just have to have probs..argh ,results out on 3rd april..pray that i'll b ok ppl...
to the boyfriend-
i look awy then i look back at you
and i dun wana fall to pieces
i just wana sit and stare at you
i dun wana talk abt it
coz i'm in love with you
ur the only one i'll be with till the end
when i come undone,u bring me back again
back frm the stars
back into ur arms
your tune brings out the inner calmness in me
your voice soothes my soul
your eyes piercing
-peterpan(ariel)
to the girlfriend- "its over and done but the heartache
live on inside"
hope actions n words done and said out of anger will not affect 5 yrs of frienship.so we have seen our flaws.we'll work on it . my beb till the end. the one and only farting burping machine.
sigh..i am such a pain to my parents for wasting their money. of all things my hip just have to have probs..argh ,results out on 3rd april..pray that i'll b ok ppl...
to the boyfriend-
i look awy then i look back at you
and i dun wana fall to pieces
i just wana sit and stare at you
i dun wana talk abt it
coz i'm in love with you
ur the only one i'll be with till the end
when i come undone,u bring me back again
back frm the stars
back into ur arms
your tune brings out the inner calmness in me
your voice soothes my soul
your eyes piercing
-peterpan(ariel)
to the girlfriend- "its over and done but the heartache
live on inside"
hope actions n words done and said out of anger will not affect 5 yrs of frienship.so we have seen our flaws.we'll work on it . my beb till the end. the one and only farting burping machine.
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yadayadayada
Monday, July 17, 2006
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yes ur ALWAYS rite in every situation..
gd 4 u,glad ur happy with ur oh so self rightious self
ok.
so well, wad the heck?tired to even carela
mayb iza u r rite,i shld be selfish once in awhile n just dun bother abt others..caring sumtimes is just a waste of time.
hmm..well,at my lowest thanks to u lovelies 4 being there
heart u ppl ...mugging for the promos i must embrace
like it or not,its the only way to achieve the things in life that i so desperately want..
gd 4 u,glad ur happy with ur oh so self rightious self
ok.
so well, wad the heck?tired to even carela
mayb iza u r rite,i shld be selfish once in awhile n just dun bother abt others..caring sumtimes is just a waste of time.
hmm..well,at my lowest thanks to u lovelies 4 being there
heart u ppl ...mugging for the promos i must embrace
like it or not,its the only way to achieve the things in life that i so desperately want..
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to whoever's concerned
Sunday, July 16, 2006
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i tot u shld noe me better 2 .u think i'm not disappointed at myself for my actions? sometimes emotion gets the better of me n thats when i need YOU to be more understanding.i told u my situation.u din seem to care. that hurts more than u'll ever noe.i have been thru shit.u noe sum of them but mostly u dun.so forgive me for being annoyed with fuckin assholes who without thinking make a judgemental remark n then ask me if i'm ok.look at my facial expression i'm sure its transparent enuf to tell u wad i freaking feel.
u noe one thing that i am disappointed in u?
u always have ur stand which u always think is right n never seem to have a second tot about the other party's situtation or feelings or y the person react the way they did.i'm disappointed y cant u put urself in the person's shoes even when they have TRIED to xplain it to u.
ur too strg headed n i'm realli tired of even trying to make u understand coz u never will.
this time i'm truely hurt.i noe u mite not care n even think that i'm bullshit.so be it.so much for frenship.
and to the bro...yes u dun seem to care at all. hooray for me.
u noe one thing that i am disappointed in u?
u always have ur stand which u always think is right n never seem to have a second tot about the other party's situtation or feelings or y the person react the way they did.i'm disappointed y cant u put urself in the person's shoes even when they have TRIED to xplain it to u.
ur too strg headed n i'm realli tired of even trying to make u understand coz u never will.
this time i'm truely hurt.i noe u mite not care n even think that i'm bullshit.so be it.so much for frenship.
and to the bro...yes u dun seem to care at all. hooray for me.
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shitty
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yes,always think about urself
great
your always right everyone else is wrong
ever stop to think n understand a person's situation
talk abt shit when u dun even noe or see me for so long
what is frenship?does it really exist?
i sacrificed my time,kept quiet when u hurt my feelings, b there when u needed me, help u go thru hardship.
u care?
u werent there 4 me when i needed u
can i just kick ur ass n make u see the real picture
such a pain in the ass u r
great
your always right everyone else is wrong
ever stop to think n understand a person's situation
talk abt shit when u dun even noe or see me for so long
what is frenship?does it really exist?
i sacrificed my time,kept quiet when u hurt my feelings, b there when u needed me, help u go thru hardship.
u care?
u werent there 4 me when i needed u
can i just kick ur ass n make u see the real picture
such a pain in the ass u r
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Saturday, July 15, 2006
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As some of u noe..i am a permanent client of naughty by nature..
They offered me a lifetime of free annual photo shoots n a special album where all pics are 'hard-covered' n the cd roms with all the photo shoots plus editted pics n 2 free photo pics for me annualy.
So aniways yesterday was a free photoshoot n i went with my 3 besties for the make over...here's how it turn out,..nice?haha u decide.
LiFa NaNa NaDia NiR
They offered me a lifetime of free annual photo shoots n a special album where all pics are 'hard-covered' n the cd roms with all the photo shoots plus editted pics n 2 free photo pics for me annualy.
So aniways yesterday was a free photoshoot n i went with my 3 besties for the make over...here's how it turn out,..nice?haha u decide.
LiFa NaNa NaDia NiR
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damn it
Thursday, July 13, 2006
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k i think ..no..i know i'm so gona have shit results for my mid yrs..
prffft!
shit la...haiz...i studied till late(to be exact:4am) b4 every paper due to nerves
n it backfired..
i slept in one of my papers!...can believe anot..
wah lao..fark man
way to go la ..sheesh
prffft!
shit la...haiz...i studied till late(to be exact:4am) b4 every paper due to nerves
n it backfired..
i slept in one of my papers!...can believe anot..
wah lao..fark man
way to go la ..sheesh
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random
Sunday, July 09, 2006
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i wana be the perfect daughter,
the perfect student,
the perfect friend ,
the perfect everything...
near imppossible?so it seems
no1 is perfect in this world
dream on nadia.
ok. so 2dae suxed
big time.
time flies.
yes they do and idiots like me who duno how to plan their time..suffers
i stupidly have all the time in the world to sit my ass down and study for the mid yrs n yet i chose to cry and waste my tears over you..nice going nadia...smart move..hah
am i a control freak?so it seems to some of you..
well thats ur view on me and him..i cant control wad u think and feel.
izzit true?
i dun think so.
do u know wad goes on behind closed doors?no. u dun
so do u think i care of wad u think?
unfortunately, i do.and its taking a toll on our already strained relationship.
i am a toking,mumbling contradiction to myself.shit.
hmm..u called and asked if u were to stop loving me wad wld i feel
wad do u think.izzit the answer obvious?
dun ask qns that u already know the ans to.
shit u.
the perfect student,
the perfect friend ,
the perfect everything...
near imppossible?so it seems
no1 is perfect in this world
dream on nadia.
ok. so 2dae suxed
big time.
time flies.
yes they do and idiots like me who duno how to plan their time..suffers
i stupidly have all the time in the world to sit my ass down and study for the mid yrs n yet i chose to cry and waste my tears over you..nice going nadia...smart move..hah
am i a control freak?so it seems to some of you..
well thats ur view on me and him..i cant control wad u think and feel.
izzit true?
i dun think so.
do u know wad goes on behind closed doors?no. u dun
so do u think i care of wad u think?
unfortunately, i do.and its taking a toll on our already strained relationship.
i am a toking,mumbling contradiction to myself.shit.
hmm..u called and asked if u were to stop loving me wad wld i feel
wad do u think.izzit the answer obvious?
dun ask qns that u already know the ans to.
shit u.
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SCREWD ! !
Saturday, July 08, 2006
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2dae was physics
damn the paper was hard
i swear the teachers made it so that we could'nt pass
i am so expecting an F la
1/2 of the paper is empty la
i have NEVER not been able to not to a paper ok
jeez n here i was expecting at least an A'O pass for the paper
i so can kiss gdbye to that
so now all i can do is rely on my math n geog la..
sheesh..
after exams i wana enjoy b4 i mug again for promos
i wana go to the zoo pls!!
i wana go hang out with my dearies
i wana watch devil in prada n superman n pirates of the carribean
i wana do a little shopping
i wana eat eat eat!
damn the paper was hard
i swear the teachers made it so that we could'nt pass
i am so expecting an F la
1/2 of the paper is empty la
i have NEVER not been able to not to a paper ok
jeez n here i was expecting at least an A'O pass for the paper
i so can kiss gdbye to that
so now all i can do is rely on my math n geog la..
sheesh..
after exams i wana enjoy b4 i mug again for promos
i wana go to the zoo pls!!
i wana go hang out with my dearies
i wana watch devil in prada n superman n pirates of the carribean
i wana do a little shopping
i wana eat eat eat!
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darn
Thursday, July 06, 2006
|
MALAY ORAL SUX!! eeeei #*&$*(
tagged by dayana,here goes:
3 schs i went :
may pri , fajar sec, MI
3 things in my handbag:
handphone, tissue , hairband
3 things i do when i am stress:
eat, slp , blast the stereo with punk rock music
3 places i go on a daily basis:
toilet, sch , hm(stoooooopid qn)
3 fav fruits:
watermelon, mango , durian
3names i go by:
nad, nadia, syg(by the bf of coz)
3 of my fav foods:
italian food , japnese food, mexican food
3 things i'm wearing now:
shorts,teeshirt..n ya go figure the rest
who is in the hse with me:
my parentsla (which dumbass comes out with these qns??)
who am i thinkin of rite now:
my bf
who did i last tok ot on the phone:
my bf
who gets on my nerves most in sch:
too many to mention
where is my phone:
on the table
where do i slp:
on the bed la (again ..stupidity of qns)
what was the last thing i ate:
hokkien mee
what colour shirt i'm wearing now:
blue
what is the closest thing to me that is blue:
the tee shirt i'm wearin
what do i like most abt sch:
the people
what is my fav colour:
black
what do i wear most jeans or shorts:
jeans
what was the last movie i watched:
stoooopid garfield
when did i start sch:
i'm 18..do the counting urself
when did i last go to the mall:
recently
when did i last burnt something:
u think i wana waste my brain cells to remember shit like dat?
3 bloggers to do this:
wiyaaa
yasmin
nab
tagged by dayana,here goes:
3 schs i went :
may pri , fajar sec, MI
3 things in my handbag:
handphone, tissue , hairband
3 things i do when i am stress:
eat, slp , blast the stereo with punk rock music
3 places i go on a daily basis:
toilet, sch , hm(stoooooopid qn)
3 fav fruits:
watermelon, mango , durian
3names i go by:
nad, nadia, syg(by the bf of coz)
3 of my fav foods:
italian food , japnese food, mexican food
3 things i'm wearing now:
shorts,teeshirt..n ya go figure the rest
who is in the hse with me:
my parentsla (which dumbass comes out with these qns??)
who am i thinkin of rite now:
my bf
who did i last tok ot on the phone:
my bf
who gets on my nerves most in sch:
too many to mention
where is my phone:
on the table
where do i slp:
on the bed la (again ..stupidity of qns)
what was the last thing i ate:
hokkien mee
what colour shirt i'm wearing now:
blue
what is the closest thing to me that is blue:
the tee shirt i'm wearin
what do i like most abt sch:
the people
what is my fav colour:
black
what do i wear most jeans or shorts:
jeans
what was the last movie i watched:
stoooopid garfield
when did i start sch:
i'm 18..do the counting urself
when did i last go to the mall:
recently
when did i last burnt something:
u think i wana waste my brain cells to remember shit like dat?
3 bloggers to do this:
wiyaaa
yasmin
nab
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SO MALU ! ! !
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
|
ok so 2dae was mly and physical geog paper
mly paper was...so-so
and physical geog was..well tough
i mean i had like only 1 1/2 hrs of slp the nite b4
cos i studied till like 4 plus am ...damn tired
went to sch took my mly paper like a blur gundu
I WENT TO THE TOILET & WENT INTO THE WRONG MALAY CLASS!!
SO...EMBARESSSING!!! OMG...KENA LAUGH SUMORE...WAH
I was so malu that at that time i wished the earth wld open n hide me me awy frm the stares and laugher
oh n by the way THAT woke me up for my physical geog paper..the blurness was gone...hehehe
p/s:2moro's a'level mly oral n friday, physics...scary!..wish me luck ppl!!!
mly paper was...so-so
and physical geog was..well tough
i mean i had like only 1 1/2 hrs of slp the nite b4
cos i studied till like 4 plus am ...damn tired
went to sch took my mly paper like a blur gundu
I WENT TO THE TOILET & WENT INTO THE WRONG MALAY CLASS!!
SO...EMBARESSSING!!! OMG...KENA LAUGH SUMORE...WAH
I was so malu that at that time i wished the earth wld open n hide me me awy frm the stares and laugher
oh n by the way THAT woke me up for my physical geog paper..the blurness was gone...hehehe
p/s:2moro's a'level mly oral n friday, physics...scary!..wish me luck ppl!!!
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in tears..
Sunday, July 02, 2006
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after coming hm from the pit(which was full of drama but yet..things ended pretty ok i guess) at ard 2 am i was flipping thru the tv channels and suddenly this cute thai guy caught me attention on tv2..so yes i watched the story till it ended ard 330 am in which by then i was cryin .. embaressing to admit la..but the show is so sad la k...here's how it went:
girl frm thailand ran frm hm to clear her head and came to new york.
was abit..blur so a taxi guy picked her up n offered to send her to the nearest hotel tho with bad intentions.
she realise that he was bringing her to sum ulu place n while driving she jump out of the taxi n got hit by a car whom the driver is the cute thai guy(Jee).
he felt really bad n brough her back to his apartment to nurse her back to health.
when she awoke,she has total memory loss...amesia,she does not noe her name ,where she came frm, wad happen to her etc.
she cld'nt recognise the alphabets xcept the word 'i'.
so jee called her eye.
Jee came to new york illegally n sumhow is tryin to earn enuf money to go back to thailand.
due to him being an illegal immigrant he has no choice but to do illegal work such as delivering of drugs.
ok so eye is really forgetful and jee tot her the way to central park if she ever got lost.
jee actualli bought her a fake ID n passport which cost him more than he cld afford .
he one day got sick n eye actualli being a very gd painter attracted a new yorker art critic into buying her work payin her a total of us$10 000 .
jee quit his illegal job and eye instead now took care of jee.
by then feelings btwn jee n eye had grew and they are completely in love esp eye who knew no1 else xcept him..basically he has become her entire life..
on the opening of her art work she collapse in the arms of jee n he brought her to the hopital where she was operated n in a coma for almost 2 mths.
he paid for her medical bill till he was broke n had no choice but to take up a job as an assasin to keep her in the hospital for her life support.
the nite b4 he did his assasin job he visited her like he always did..cried feeling so helpless thinking that he was loosing her and left..
instead jee got set up n was shot.
she was brought back to thailand n din not remember anything..
one day her memory got triggered n she came back to new york to look for jee but was told he was shot dead..
she came to central park cryin n unexpectedly found him there homeless tho he kept her artwork all the while.
he told her he was there just in case she lost her way again.
he was in real bad shape b'coz his gunshot wound wasent treated.
they embraced and then he died in her arms..
fucking ending la,haiz,i dun think u guys wld feel the sadness till u see the show..trouble is i duno the title cos it was in thai language with mly sub titles which din show the title as well,argh!!
girl frm thailand ran frm hm to clear her head and came to new york.
was abit..blur so a taxi guy picked her up n offered to send her to the nearest hotel tho with bad intentions.
she realise that he was bringing her to sum ulu place n while driving she jump out of the taxi n got hit by a car whom the driver is the cute thai guy(Jee).
he felt really bad n brough her back to his apartment to nurse her back to health.
when she awoke,she has total memory loss...amesia,she does not noe her name ,where she came frm, wad happen to her etc.
she cld'nt recognise the alphabets xcept the word 'i'.
so jee called her eye.
Jee came to new york illegally n sumhow is tryin to earn enuf money to go back to thailand.
due to him being an illegal immigrant he has no choice but to do illegal work such as delivering of drugs.
ok so eye is really forgetful and jee tot her the way to central park if she ever got lost.
jee actualli bought her a fake ID n passport which cost him more than he cld afford .
he one day got sick n eye actualli being a very gd painter attracted a new yorker art critic into buying her work payin her a total of us$10 000 .
jee quit his illegal job and eye instead now took care of jee.
by then feelings btwn jee n eye had grew and they are completely in love esp eye who knew no1 else xcept him..basically he has become her entire life..
on the opening of her art work she collapse in the arms of jee n he brought her to the hopital where she was operated n in a coma for almost 2 mths.
he paid for her medical bill till he was broke n had no choice but to take up a job as an assasin to keep her in the hospital for her life support.
the nite b4 he did his assasin job he visited her like he always did..cried feeling so helpless thinking that he was loosing her and left..
instead jee got set up n was shot.
she was brought back to thailand n din not remember anything..
one day her memory got triggered n she came back to new york to look for jee but was told he was shot dead..
she came to central park cryin n unexpectedly found him there homeless tho he kept her artwork all the while.
he told her he was there just in case she lost her way again.
he was in real bad shape b'coz his gunshot wound wasent treated.
they embraced and then he died in her arms..
fucking ending la,haiz,i dun think u guys wld feel the sadness till u see the show..trouble is i duno the title cos it was in thai language with mly sub titles which din show the title as well,argh!!